What is the funniest joke you've been told that you still think about to this day?

“A lovely little area of the old part of town, McCleary Street.”

“Mother Mary. And on what street in Dublin did you live?”

“The Murphy twins are drunk again.”

What a list actors/ actresses are notorious for being jerks in real life?

The first fellow is now beside himself. “The good Lord must be smiling on us. Imagine that the two of us should be meeting here, having grown up on the same street, gone to the same school, and graduated in the same year.”

“Faith and begorrah. What a small world. So did I. And to what school would you school would you have been going?”

Two blokes are sitting at the end of a bar. One orders a drink. The other one says, “From your voice, I’d guess you’re from Ireland.”

What are you wearing under your clothes today?

At that point, a woman enters, stands at the other end, and orders a drink. Brian, the bartender says, “Oh, Vicky, it’s going to be a long, tiring night.”

“As did I,” the first bloke says, getting very excited. “And what year did you graduate?”

“Well, to St. Mary’s, of course.”

Can you turn 150 pages into a 5 minute presentation before a meeting?

“Oh, let me see now. ’Twas 1964, it was.”

I’m from Dublin, I am.”

“Now why would you be saying that, Brian?”

Why did Mark Lane harass Helen Markham during an illegally recorded telephone conversation to misidentify Lee Harvey Oswald who she witnessed as the shooter of Tippit?

“So am I. And from where in Ireland might you be?” says the first.

“Yes, that I am,” says the second.